The lives of celebrities are very public affairs. Breakups, breakdowns, make-ups, and makeouts are splashed across the front page of tabloids. A lot of this so-called news is trivial and trashy, but every once in a while, an aspect of celeb life comes out that's truly interesting. In this case, it’s their cars of choice. How do the elite of TV make their morning commutes? Well, some do it in style, and others, well, aren’t quite as stylish.
TV stars are some seriously rich people, making hundreds of thousands of dollars per episode. With this great income comes great responsibility: choosing an appropriate ride to spend all that money on. Some TV stars do it well, indulging in high-end classics or modern supercars. Others, however, maybe didn’t grow up around cars. Or they just really don’t know a thing about vehicles.
A car says a lot about a person's personality, and when money is no object, the resemblance can be even greater. That makes it even more confusing as to why some of these stars drive some of these cars. Perhaps it's a nod to frugality or a way of blending in with the crowd, but some of these cars seriously suck. Thankfully, for every star pushing a low-end sedan, there's another one shooting flames out the back of his or her Aventador. Scroll down to see 10 stars who drive beaters, and 10 who drive the sickest rides.
20 Conan O'Brien- Ford Taurus SHO
Who thought you would ever see Conan O’Brien in a race suit, let alone next to a Ford Taurus SHO? O’Brien is a bit older, so perhaps, something with too many ponies is a little much to handle for him. Or perhaps, he has a big soft spot for American car companies. There are multiple reports alleging he owns this car, so this is probably more than just a publicity stunt.
For one of the biggest names in late-night TV talk shows, a Taurus SHO is a fairly frugal choice.
What does the SHO stand for, you ask? Super High Output. How high? 220 hp. Not exactly earth-shattering. Perhaps Mr. Conan fell victim to potent marketing jargon. Next time, he should spend a bit more money on his car before he buys the race suit.
19 Aaron Paul- Lamborghini Aventador
It seems like Aaron Paul is not only balling out on TV making meth. In fact, it would probably be pretty tough to drive a Lambo if you were selling drugs. Good thing he's an actor, and a very wealthy one at that. An Aventador isn't cheap, but if you’re going to spend megabucks on a car, it’s a great bang for your buck. First off, just look at it. That’s worth a few thousand alone. Mr. Paul will be sitting in front of a demonic 6.5L V12, which cranks out 690 hp. That gives this scissor-doored cyclone 1 hp for every 2 kilos—a little bit faster than a Taurus (sorry, Conan). Perhaps, the drug culture's flair for the fantastic has influenced Mr. Paul's purchase, or he just likes really fast Italian cars. Regardless, this all-black Aventador is a super hot celebrity ride.
18 Jimmy Fallon- Mini Cooper
There’s no way this is some promo or movie spy shot. Mr. Fallon has been spotted many a time behind the wheel of the ultra blasé Mini Cooper. This is the host of arguably the largest late-night TV talk show, and here he is punting around in a mid-range commuter car.
The problem with this is that buying a Mini entails you want to stand out from the standard commuter crowd, and you view a Mini as a superior choice.
It’s even worse that we're talking about a celebrity with millions of dollars here. Manhattan does have brutal parking, but it’s doubtful Mr. Fallon is jostling for curbside spaces. New York is the center of the world, and the host of the city's biggest TV talk show shouldn't drive a Mini.
17 Kim Kardashian- Ferrari 458 Italia
Kim Kardashian owning a Ferrari 458 is probably the best thing she's ever done for the world. Here’s why: very wealthy people like Mrs. Kardashian spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to buy cars like Ferrari 458s. This means Ferrari gets paid a lot of money and can spend the profit on more important things like race cars. If she wasn’t in this world to spend exorbitant amounts of money on Ferraris, who would be? This is also a gorgeous all-white 458, and the matte-black rims tie up a really classy package. The oversized bright-yellow calipers are just icing on the cake. Luckily for Mrs. Kardashian, the 458 comes with a semi-auto gearbox, meaning she won’t have to clunk her way through a clutch with those heels.
16 Emma Watson- Toyota Prius
You’d think a celeb with offshore savings would have something a little ritzier than a Prius. Yes, it's environmentally friendly, but this is Emma Watson. Why is she not driving a Tesla? Ms. Watson has been spotted plenty of times behind the wheel of the turtle-like Toyota, validating this is more than some sad publicity stunt.
The Prius is otherworldly in its averageness. The acceleration is mute, the brakes soft, the handling squishy, and the interior tacky.
There's not much redeeming about this car, so why Ms. Watson continues to peddle it around is a mystery. Perhaps, Toyota execs have some financial blackmail keeping her planted behind the wheel of a Prius. Let’s hope not.
15 Ashley Tisdale- Mercedes G550
Did you see this one coming? Ashley Tisdale rose to fame playing a ditzy high schooler in Disney's High School Musical franchise and has since gone on to feature in various TV series. She isn’t exactly an A-list celeb, but she obviously puts a lot of value on having a sick ride. A G550 isn't cheap, and this isn't a cheap-looking Mercedes. The murdered-out paint job and ultra-dark window tint give the Mercedes a tough look, helped by the bold and bulky body lines. Tisdale currently lives in LA, so she assumedly spends plenty of time in traffic. She certainly must sit pretty in her G550, towering over the common commuters beneath her, lounging in the SUV's gigantic interior—sounds like an ok life.
14 Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi- Custom Cadillac Escalade
Classy? No. Fancy? Definitely not. Expected? Absolutely. Jersey Shore was a particularly infected pimple that popped up in MTV’s schedule in 2009. Drunk Oompa Loompas were left to run wild in a seaside New Jersey house, with seemingly endless amounts of money and time. Snooki was the pint-sized queen of the roost, launching to stardom through a mix of antics and an antagonizing attitude. The series was huge, and the rest of the cast drive some impressive cars. This isn't impressive. This hurts to look at. An Escalade can look pretty tough, and there's a potential for a pink and black paint scheme looking good. However, this isn't it and perhaps should be a warning for designers to steer clear of this palette.
13 Sofia Vergara- Range Rover
Beautiful people drive beautiful cars; it’s probably some extension of the laws of attraction. Sofia Vergara’s relationship with Range Rover has been well documented, as the Colombian actress has a particular affinity for the boxy British cars.
A Range Rover is by no means a hyper-luxury car, and you’d think one of the highest-paid people on TV would drive something a little ritzier, but Range Rover and Vergara go together so well.
Classy and understated yet powerful and capable, both the driver and the car must be aware of how good they look together. If we could all look like this running errands, the world would be a much better place. Let’s start by all getting white Range Rovers. And then red dresses.
12 Mila Kunis- EG Civic
Yeah, this is for real. This isn’t off of a set nor some weird ad; this is what Mila Kunis was driving for a while. Even after the fame from That '70s Show, Kunis stayed low key and continued to push an early 2000s EG Civic. Maybe this is some sort of nod toward ignoring capitalist concepts, but she could do so much better than a bummy old Civic. Skateboarders and Pizza Boys drive EG Civics, not TV stars. Even if she had some secret passion for the JDM scene, she'd certainly be in some R-Type Kanjo rocket. Let’s all hope Kunis is driving something a little classier now or at least sees how cheap she would sell the EG for. Let’s start at $1,500.
11 Ashton Kutcher- Custom Chevrolet Impala
On the other side of the Kutcher-Kunis garage, probably tucked away behind some EG Civics, is this eye-catching Impala. Apparently. Kutcher has a habit of collecting cars, and this Impala is his particular pride and joy. You can’t blame him; look at it. The paint job is mesmerizing, hypnotizing even. At least one accident must've been caused by this jaw-dropping detail. It’s also worth noting that Kutcher appears to be decked out in the same color scheme as his ride, with a pale pink cap and purple shirt working well with the paint job. It must be a strange sight to see the Kutcher-Kunis family commuting in the morning, with an EG civic and Custom Impala sharing the same driveway. Stranger things have happened.
10 David Spade- Buick Grand National
If this was one of the fierce turbo V6 Grand Nationals produced in the late '80s, then Spade would be on the other side of the coin. But this is, in fact, a standard and sleepy Grand National, driven by one of the biggest TV stars of the past decades. How can this be? Spade is notoriously dry and perhaps is pulling some communal wool over all our eyes with this, laughing at our incredulous responses. Or perhaps, he's a man of frugal nature, not wanting to splurge on expensive, performance cars.
But almost anyone can do better than a deadbeat Grand National.
There’s a wide world of imported options or more attractive domestic counterparts, but Spade has instead stuck with the Grand National. Some things don't make sense.
9 Bill Cosby- BMW 2002
Who would've thought Bill Cosby would drive an orange BMW 2002? He seems to be more of a luxury-sedan guy or maybe some sort of gaudy beige Deville. But Bill keeps it classy, choosing an absolute German classic.
The 2002 has one of the most attractive front ends of any car, with the petite grille and the round headlights becoming a staple at car shows and race tracks around the world.
2002 was one of BMW’s first international successes, and Cosby obviously was and still is a fan of this German coupe. It’s nice to see someone with this much money appreciating the midrange classics, rather than exclusively driving ultra-exotic vehicles. Whether or not Bill pedals this Beemer for all it’s worth is unclear, but it’s clear this is one sick celebrity whip.
8 Julie Bowen- Fiat 500
This is one of the highest-paid actresses on TV, driving one of the uglier and more dysfunctional compact cars of the 21st century. Why does she do this to herself? It's a common stereotype that Italian cars possess a certain amount of character, challenging their owners with constant surprises of breakdowns and operational quirks. The 500 is no different, and surely, Bowen must’ve had her issue with this snail-shaped commuter. As you can tell from the image, perhaps Bowen isn’t the happiest person on the road. In her Fiat 500, she seems to be getting a ticket here—not exactly how a superstar should be seen. If she was driving a common Camry or CRV, she probably would’ve been left alone—another reason to not buy Fiat.
7 Charlie Sheen- Bulletproof Maybach
Wrong type of protection, Charlie. Even if he's safe from bullets in his Maybach, the car did little to keep him safe from contracting HIV. Nor did it stop hooligans from stealing two of Sheen’s Mercedes-Benzes and driving them off of cliffs near his Hollywood Hills home. All aside about Sheen himself, this Maybach is truly impressive. If a Mercedes wasn’t expensive enough, there are always Maybachs. These are the epitome of luxury, with the interior looking more like a furniture showroom than a vehicle. Why did Sheen need a bulletproof class? He probably knows why. But for the rest of us, it means this luxury sedan is even sicker. Road rage is much less intimidating in a bulletproof vehicle and is probably much less stressful when you can lie down in your car's backseat.
6 Ray Romano- Ford Fiesta
There was hope for a second—because if this little Ford party had an RS badge on it, Ray Romano would be one sick individual, quietly driving a car way cooler than any of us can tell.
But there's no RS badge on this completely box-stock Fiesta, and it seems as if Romano has some issues seeing colors properly—because no one would actually pay money for this paint job.
You like bruised grapes? Seems like Ray does. This guy is one of the most recognizable names and voices on TV, yet here he is driving a car crappier than you probably drive. If you look closely in the background, you can see all kinds of racier creations on show, yet our man Ray chose to post up next to his Fiesta. I hope Ford sent him some royalties.
5 Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson- Nissan GTR
This is apparently one of many insane cars in The Rock's possession, but it was a no-brainer. Every wrestler turned movie star should drive a gold GTR. Make it an Orange County law. The Rock and the GTR share a lot in common; both weigh close to 2,000 kilos, are incredibly powerful, and attract a bunch of attention. Good move, Dwayne.
The GTR has been nicknamed “Godzilla,” which is probably what The Rock would be called if he ever showed up in Japan driving a gold GTR.
The Rock must appreciate some nuance in his cars, as the GTR isn't the flashiest supercar but delivers the good in terms of performance. Giant turbos, intelligent all-wheel drive, and extensive Nismo make this an absolute missile. That’s also gold.
4 Selena Gomez- Ford Escape
Some things in life don’t make sense, and this is one of them. Selena Gomez started as a Disney star and has since graduated to starring roles on the big screen and a fairly popular music career. But here she is trundling around in easily one of the most boring cars ever created. Doesn’t your pulse jump when you see another generic grey fridge rolling down the street? Hers must. To add insult to injury, this is one of the worst implementations of Hybrid technology in any vehicle. A giant poorly built SUV with a giant heavy battery isn't going to work well with internal combustion or electric power. The Escape looks bad, runs bad, costs too much, and just generally sucks. Maybe Gomez slides under the paparazzi’s radar in this mundane motor vehicle, as they assume it’s probably some star's deadbeat aunt.
3 Simon Cowell- Bugatti Veyron
Get it, Simon. Go out there, and get it in your Bugatti Veyron. For one of the most judgmental personalities on TV, a Veyron is an excellent choice. He can sit in his million-dollar supercar, judging all those plebeians around him in their standard rides. If he's going to act like he's better than everyone, it’s a good thing he drives a car that’s better than everyone else's.
The Veyron is an iconic car, holding the title of the world's fastest production car for a few years and dropping all sorts of jaws with its body lines and price point.
Can you imagine the line of American Idol hopefuls lined up in front of that day's venue shaking in their boots as Cowell rolls up in a Bugatti, knowing fully well that that same man would be picking their performances apart? Good luck.
2 James Gandolfini- Vespa
It’s missing two wheels, but this is so unbelievable it has to be included. This is Tony Soprano in real life. He should be in a Maserati with a really loud exhaust and extra-tinted windows. It’s not like this Vespa debacle is a one-off; Gandolfini's been photographed dozens of times plodding around on this lackluster scooter. You’re a star—buy a nicer scooter! Or a motorbike. Or go crazy and buy a car. If this man went by you on his scooter, you'd assume he was returning empties or on his way to the welfare center. This guy is a celebrity, and he should be showing off. We need the rich like Gandolfini to buy expensive things for us to lust after; otherwise, what will inspire our unrealistic economic dreams? At the very least, Gandolfini needs a helmet, and the Vespa needs a better paint job. With racing stripes.
1 Jay Leno- Jaguar E-Type
Last and by far not the least, Jay Leno is the TV star with the sickest collection of cars. He might even just be the guy with the sickest car collection. His collection is extensive, endless, overwhelming, and very well chronicled, but this E-Type is one the highlights. Every shut line on this car is credit-card tight, and the detailing around the windshield and the windows is so unnecessarily beautiful. The hood? Perfect. The wheels? Breathtaking. The all-white hardtop coupe layout? Pretty much perfect. It’s obvious someone like Jay Leno wouldn't own some half-shot Jaguar. If he gets a car, he gets the best specimen he can find. It’s safe to assume this Jag is immaculate underneath; Leno would take nothing less. Certain cars are drafted in a timeless manner, and the E-Type is still one of the best-looking cars today.
Sources: businessinsider.com; wheels.ca; celebritycarsblog.com