I have a working theory that the modern-day automobile has taken the place of the horse in terms of affection. Sure, the automobile has replaced the horse for transportation, but written in our DNA are countless generations of men who not only rode hard but also had a relationship with the vehicle they drove. We men love a primal beast. We love the animal instinct and see ourselves in it; this is why we love big engines, lots of horsepower, and reliable engineering. Just like a horse that got sick, you didn't abandon it to die; you did right by the animal because it hadn't let you down. We've come a long way from the simple days of taking care of what's yours. We now live in a world where everything is disposable, including people, it seems. Nothing is built to last very long, and sometimes, things are designed to fail at a certain period of time.

This is why we long for the power and craftsmanship that went into these old beasts. They were good, strong, and made by men who wanted to make a good car, not bigger numbers on the quarterly reports. For us hot-blooded men with genes tied back to these men of old, these cars are for us. TV and Hollywood made many famous, or maybe they made whatever they appeared in famous. Either way, here are the "baddest" beasts from America for a M-A-N. For all you boys out there with peach fuzz on your face driving micro-sedans with golf-cart engines, this is a lesson in what a man is, son...

18 1977 Trans Am

Via Shearcomfort.com

In 1977, every teenager wanted a Trans Am after seeing the car run circles in Smokey and win the heart of a drop-dead gorgeous Sally Field. 1977 was a time when 200 HP wasn't too hefty but nothing to laugh at either. In the transitioning away from the muscle-car era, this car stood to remind us that style goes a long way as well. For anyone thinking of trying to score a date with a gracefully aged Sally Field or run defense for your 18-wheeler full of illegal booze across the country, this may be the best way to do it in style—the Burt Reynolds style, that is.

17 1967 Shelby Mustang GT500

Via Historics.co.uk

With a known top speed of 170 MPH, this is a death sentence within a few weeks for most of us because, with a 428 CI, 7-liter V8, you can't ever drive responsibly. It was made famous first by the one owned by Jim Morrison, the one that he used to terrorize the streets in 1967 and then the iconic "Eleanor" from the 2000 movie Gone in Sixty Seconds. In the movie, Nicholas Cage is actually driving a good ol' FastBack, but the cinematic creation of this monster of a car, outrunning everyone and everything—even police choppers—made us all want one really really bad. There was a prototype driven by Shelby himself that reportedly topped 170 MPH with a 427 FE GT40 racing engine. Perhaps this is what the director had in mind with Eleanor.

16 1968 Ford Mustang 390 GT

Via Univision.com

Few readers will know of a movie called Bullitt, and even less will know who Steve McQueen was. He was the all-American badass in the '60s era. His characters were the anti-hero before the anti-hero was a fad in movies. He lived the way he acted—dangerously and on the edge.

The car-chase scene in the movie is probably the greatest in cinematic history, with the camera rolling in the car for a large portion of the scene. The Mustang keeps pace with the Charger 440 Magnum, which was a small fraction more powerful than the Mustang. Buy this Mustang, a straight razor, and a leather jacket to go with it—now you're a man, son.

15 1974 Dodge Monaco

Dodge Monaco in The Blues Brothers
Via en.dodge-club.net

If for no other reason than to tell people "I'm on a mission from God" at every stop light, you should have this car. The 220 HP and 440 CI engine isn't anything to scoff at. In the words of Dan Aykroyd, "It's got a cop motor, a 440-cubic-inch plant. It's got cop tires, cop suspension, cop shocks.

It's a model made before catalytic converters so it'll run good on regular gas." No way to tell if it could really make the successful jump across a drawbridge, but there's only one way to truly find out. You can knock some Neo-Nazis off the bridge while you're at it.

14 1958 Plymouth Fury

Via Wikipedia.com

Anyone who's seen John Carpenter's Christie knows why this car makes the list. Who wouldn't want a car to kill all of your enemies in high school? For other reasons than just Stephen King fantasies, this car is rather impressive; with 240 HP and a 318 CI engine, it's not like you can't run them down yourself!

My favorite scene is when the car repairs itself, popping dents and dings out right before our eyes. Remember, though, yours probably won't do this.

13 1967 Chevy Impala

This car is made out of steel testicles and testosterone. With a 502-cubic-inch big-block V8 and 420 HP, this thing shows that size does matter. Made famous in more recent times in the popular demon-hunting TV show Supernatural, this thing fit into the script perfectly. Looking like a young undertaker is about to challenge you to a race, this 18-foot-long stallion leaves no question as to who has the biggest cojones on the road. You dad didn't hunt demons and leave one to you? Well, scrounge up 16 to 18 grand, and you might find one that's black. Just make sure you know how to handle it if you do. Remember, no airbags!

12 1992-2006 AM General Hummer

Via Selectluxurycars.com

What's the absolute best way to show the world the size of your masculinity? This military monstrosity was like a grizzly bear on crystal meth. This thing was every man's dream and every environmentalist's nightmare.

With 300 horses, an almost 8,000 lb towing capability, and less than 12 MPG, this thing eats the ozone for breakfast.

Discontinued in 2007 due to the purported impossibility of getting it in line with EPA emission standards, you can still find them for around $40,000- $ 60,000. Of course, after spending all that money on one, you may be more desperate for gas than a mobile hospital running on a generator.

11 1970 Dodge Charger R/T

Via Youtube.com

Toretto made it famous back in 2001 with The Fast and The Furious. With lots of crime, police chasing, police defecting, and explosions, everyone remembers this movie and this car.

Yes, it's true that for several years after, the streets were plagued with wannabe "souped-up" cars, crashing and killing pedestrians (and hopefully themselves). I won't hold that against this movie, and I won't hold it against this car. With a 426 Hemi that roars with 425 HP, this thing was and still is a damn beast. If you got the nads to drive it, you're a man in my book.

10 1959 Cadillac Coupe DeVille

Via Pininterest.com

What's a better way to express your masculinity than to drive to the middle of a desert, get liquored up, spend all your money on slot machines and prostitutes, then sail back home in a big pink land yacht known as the "Coupe DeVille"?

Yes, this one gets a nod, with its 6.4-liter V8, 325 HP in a 390 CI engine.

This thing looked pretty but was all beast inside. Just why, you ask, did Elvis Presley decide to start a trend with pink Cadillacs? Because he was Elvis, and if you're a big enough man to rock pink, everyone better step aside. The Fleetwood model was made famous in Pink Cadillac with Clint Eastwood.

9 1969 Dodge Charger

Via Carsoup.com

If you're Bo or Luke Duke menacing the local sheriff's department, this was the perfect vehicle to do it in. With a 426 Hemi that has 425 horses, it's a surefire way to have police cars rolling over left and right during your daily escapades.

If you're just a good ol' boy, never meaning any harm, this Charger is for you, sir. Men of a certain age will remember watching this car in action on CBS from 1979 to 1985. For anyone wondering about that controversial flag you see on it, that used to stand for rebellion and standing against the system, which is exactly what the Duke brothers did in this Charger.

8 1972 Ford Gran Torino

Via Youtube.com

When Clint Eastwood's movie The Gran Torino came out, many younger men had never heard about the rarely seen or talked-about muscle car. In the movie, Eastwood is a lot like the car itself—bold and unforgiving yet somehow stands unchallenged. Eastwood's movie shows us that even bigots have hearts, and no matter how complicated our world gets, the older way of doing things is usually better. With the 385 V8 engine, this thing had 205 HP with a 4-barrel carburetor. Reasonably affordable at around $25,000, it'll last much longer than your overpriced SUV made out of plastic and aluminum. No computer, no airbags—just gas and fire with a whole lot of chrome.

7 1961 Ferrari 250 GT SWB California Spider

Via Classicdriver.com

Ferris Bueller's Day Off made this little road gem iconic. Who wouldn't want to steal a Ferrari from their dad, skip school, and create an adventure out of the whole thing? The infamous scene is hard to watch for anyone who truly appreciates the engineering and the power of this vehicle.

With the Ferrari's rear on a jack while it spins in reverse, the troubled Cameron, fed up with his father's controlling authoritarianism, begins kicking the front of the car; causing dents and cracks. After he's done and accepts the fate of what he's done, he sets his foot on the bumper, finally tipping over the jack and sending the Ferrari backward through a pane of glass and free-falling 4 stories to its demise.

6 1969 Corvette Stingray

Via Youtube.com

Pure badassness—that's what this thing is on four wheels. With an optional 435 HP 427 CI engine, this thing is a fierce primal beast from days of old when you got punched in the mouth for being an idiot and men drink their coffee black with no cream.

For roughly $35,000, you can purvey your local streets and make all the males feel inadequate as you pass them by. Jimi Hendrix owned a gold-painted one, and one thing's for sure: this thing was definitely enough muscle for the "Voodoo Chile." 0-60 in just 6 seconds will have you wearing that old black leather jacket you own and flirting with sorority girls at your local college campus.

5 1970 Plymouth Barracuda

Via petrolicious.com

If Lucifer came to our wayward planet, he would drive a 1970 Plymouth Barracuda because, according to the Rolling Stones, he's a man of taste. With a 426 Hemi V8 that shoots rather than drives with 425 HP, this thing is pretty dangerous for a novice. However, if you had to pick a car to end your life in, this isn't a really bad choice, buddy. Regardless, you probably wouldn't feel the front clip hitting your sternum through the steering wheel anyway at 140+ MPH. Made famous by iconic song "Barracuda" by Heart, and The Fast and The Furious franchise, this thing is a legend in American motors. Expect to spend over $75,000 to find one with the Hemi in it, but you could always finance it and get life insurance to cover the note.

4 1949 Mercury Coupe

Via Forzamotorsportwiki-fandom.com

One look at this thing and you see why Alan Jackson was crazy about a mercury and why gangsters of an older generation chose it occasionally as an intimidation factor on 4 wheels.

With only 110 HP and a 4,000 lb weight, it didn't have much in the performance area as it did in craftsmanship.

It has more chrome than a backyard NRA meeting and more metal than public drinking water in Michigan. 1949 was a time of quiet, silent strength. WWII raged across the earth, and for the original owner of this Mercury, it was a quiet stoicism in the simple wisdom of uncomplicated living and driving.

3 1967 Chevrolet Camaro Z-28

Autotraderclassics.com

The factory-rated HP was 290. The only problem with that is you find out once you drive it that they had lied—and had good reason to (insurance). Most Camaro admirers estimate 400 HP from this ballistic missile on 4 wheels.

A 350-cubic-inch 5.7-liter V8 plant drives this monster wherever you point it—and really, really damn fast. If you feel that you're tough enough to break this horse, be prepared to drop 60-70 grand on a mint-condition one. Of course, you could always steal it, and chances are, you'd get away, as there's no GPS in this thing to spoil the fun!

2  1959 Cadillac Miller-Meteor

Via Barrett-jackson.com

Yeah, I took it there. Every man out there knows (like I do) that if given the opportunity to drive this, he wouldn't hesitate one fraction of a second. Even if your girlfriend left you and you were pulled over by police for blaring the siren, you all know it'd be worth it!

With a 390-cubic-inch 6.4-liter V8 and 325 HP, this thing has the power to get you to your psychiatrist appointment fast! One downside is that it's ugly as all hell, plus parts will probably cost more than your property taxes do, seeing as in 1959 they only made 21,947 of these things. Still, the question remains—are you man enough to drive this?

1 1984 Ford F-150

Via Cargurus.com

The ultimate car for a man isn't a shiny black Hummer or a '67 Mustang. All of the preceding cars are the cars we wanted when we were young, angry, and wanted to drive fast to numb it all out. When we make it through that hurricane that every man must go through, this truck right here is all a man needs.

Simple, tough, reliable—and those are the things that count. She won't break your wallet and won't break apart through the years like new cars will. With 210 HP in the Windsor motor, she can get up and go just fine any day. The one product that Ford put a lot of integrity into is their truck line.