Since being introduced back in 1953, America's favorite fiberglass speedster has a rich history of customization. From wacky station wagons to stretch limos, the Chevrolet Corvette has been a tantalizing medium on which to sculpt the wildest of automotive dreams.
Naturally, the paint scheme is a big part of that. And for some, the crazier the application the better. A quick Google search reveals that patriotic themes are a big one for the born-in-the-U.S.A. sports car. And, for some reason, abstract splashes with no discernible rhyme or reason are also quite popular with "inventive" Vette customizers.
There is just something about the Corvette's sexy shape that brings out the best (and worst) in people's color palette and design choices. Sadly, the flashy body style only amplifies bad decision-making, cranking the eye volume up to eleven. Brace for impact - here are 15 horrific examples of Corvette paint jobs gone terribly wrong.
15 Paint Misbehavin' (For A Good Cause)
These three guys from GM are responsible for what happened to this new Corvette. This art car was actually auctioned off for charity, which is very noble. But the dude who bought it probably spent weeks driving to auto body places asking how much to repaint this $400,000 monstrosity.
14 In The Heat Of The White
Painting flames on a car is nothing new. In fact, it is among the top choices of hot rodders when it comes to customizing their rides. However, not every car is a good candidate for the flame scheme. Exhibit A is this Corvette convertible, not exactly known for its "white hot" performance.
13 Sad But True
Back in the day, some swizzle stick thought it would be a grand idea to get abstract with this rare Corvette. Of course, its paint is peeling and faded, so perhaps it looked "cool, man" back when it was fresh. Perhaps the "artist" was suffering from a substance abuse problem, and that abused substance was "a lack of talent."
12 Red, White, And Boooo
We get it, you love America. But does America love you? Not after what you did to this Stingray. While the flag paint job is spectacular and patriotic, this Corvette is quite unsettling to the eye. While we don't generally condone flag burning, we can make an exception in this case.
11 Hopefully That Was Water-Based Paint
Somewhere underneath that cheap, theatrical paint job is one of the best cars ever made in these here United States. Get the yellow tape, this is a crime scene. Hello, police ... we'd like to report a murder ... of a Corvette. The murderer will be easy to spot - he's covered in DayGlo paint and lacks any imagination whatsoever.
10 When You Can't Decide What Color To Go With
Now it's time to pick a color, sir. All of them, please. Likely, this is a wrap. Wraps are for people who like all of the expense of a professional paint job, but only want the lasting permanence of a wish. Every color known to Pantone can be found on this hideous beast. Nice rims, though.
9 The Flames Are Supposed To Be Red
The person formally known as Prince would be upset with what has happened to this little red Corvette. Chocolate brown flames, are you kidding (they could be black, but we're going with brown)? Are we driving a sports car or making fondue? Was this Willy Wonka's idea? He should stick to Gobstoppers.
8 Yellow And Black Attack
Is this Corvette owned by singer-guitarist Michael Sweet of the Christian metal band Stryper? It should be. Jesus, this car is all over the place. Note that the matte black back end gives way to a shiny-as-hell T-tops section. Then comes the yellow. Sure, Corvette yellow is a thing ... but this scheme is God-awful.
7 Betsy Ross Would Not Be Proud
We get it, the Corvette is an American car. What we don't get is this paint job, which was a bad idea, even drunk on the Fourth of July. The car's cool shape and sexy lines are canceled out by random rips and tears of patriotic excess. Let's fly the Chevy flag at half-mast.
6 Let Me Count The Ways
Where to start with this blue abomination, one of the worst custom Vettes to ever hit the road. First of all, fat white walls have no business being there. And the weird graphic treatments boggle the mind. What, blue and white was not enough, so you introduced red into the mix? This is the work of a lunatic.
5 The Force Is Strong With This One
This one is from a galaxy far, far away. Science fiction nerds will no doubt wet themselves at the sight of this Star Wars-themed 1974 Corvette that recently sold at auction for just over $10,000. Good thing it only has two seats because you will likely be riding Han Solo in this thing.
4 All Kinds Of Wrong
Let's take one of the worst Corvettes in terms of performance and body style, pump it full of steroids, and give it a My Little Pony paint job. Second-only to the rolling disaster that was the lead car in the film Corvette Summer, this metallic monster is somebody's Frankenstein. Gather up the pitchforks, let's put a stop to this now.
3 Stop, You Are Scaring The Children
This car's paint scheme is proof that neon yellow is not a good accent color. Ever. It's a good thing this embarrassment is stationed overseas - we can take the owner to a CIA black site to interrogate him and find out WTF he was thinking when he instructed an auto body center to "make it look bad from any angle."
2 Tribal Convictions
For the douche who has everything .... This insane custom cyclops Vette is what happens when close friends are too nice to say "stop doing that." There is nothing about this car that is pleasant to the eye. It goes in many directions at once, and all of them are bad. On the bright side, it might be fast.
1 What Color, Sir? Every Single One Of Them
Sure, this Crayola cruiser is likely a wrap job. But, why? Is a simple black or red paint scheme so boring that the only option was every option? The wheels, body kit and rear wing are all wickedly cool add-ons worthy of a one- or two-color masterstroke. Unfortunately, the owner of this Vette opted for "acid trip."
Sources: Pinterest, Autojunk, Vette