We’ve already had the “beauty is subjective” discussion tons of times. This statement holds true even for motorcycles: what’s beautiful for us, is another man’s beast. Although bikes have gone a long way to be the powerful machines they are today, nothing beats simplicity.
Sadly, nowadays most engineers are obsessed with overcomplicating and turning almost every motorcycle into a monster. The lessons from the past, when simplicity was celebrated and perfected, are forgotten. Anyway, we don’t deny how badass is to storm the streets with a sturdy bike - it’s the perfect way to get attention. But, as you know, attention can backfire. The motorcycles on this list will show you how that happens.
10 Ducati Multistrada
Sometimes it doesn’t matter where you’re going, but how you’re going there. And if your means of transportation is the Multistrada, we have some bad news for you. Do you know that for a long time, this motorcycle was called the “Uglystrada?”
And according to us, such references aren’t entirely wrong. Yes, Ducati usually gets the styling and engineering altogether right. But the Multistrada was a horrendous miss. The front headlights make it look like a vacuum cleaner rather than a sports bike.
9 CF Moto V5 Sport Cruiser
The Chinese aren’t known for their automotive design, whether it is cars or motorcycles. However, the V5 Sport Cruiser is almost scary. We cannot seem to decide whether it belongs in a household appliance storage or a garage. Unfortunately, this bike and most of CF Moto’s products are heavily commercialized, which explains their lack of creativity.
And it’s not fast either. But then again, you can buy a new one for only $4,000. In the end, you get what you pay for. In this case, you get a motorcycle that, according to many reviews, grows on you. So, don’t let our definition of ugly stop you.
8 Lightning LS-218
We have to admit; if you ride the Lightning LS-218, it doesn’t seem ugly to you anymore. That’s because you fall in love with it, like a complete idiot. It’s actually one of the most extraordinary motorcycles to exist. It’s electric, but it doesn’t perform like one. In other words, it’s crazy fast.
It has only 200 horsepower, but it has so much torque that you’ll feel like flying. Its top speed is 218 mph. You might ask yourself if it’s that good why is it on this list? Well, judging it from outside, without ever hearing or reading about it, the LS-218 looks like it’s about to burst. Its looks aren’t intimidating or elegant. At least its performance is
7 Johammer J1
The Johammer J1 is an Austrian electric motorbike that’s considered a bug by many motorcycle enthusiasts. While we agree that the future of motorcycling is probably electric, it surely doesn’t rely on bug-looking vehicles. Not only that it’s strange-looking, but also overly expensive, for its value.
The top speed of the Johammer J1 is only 74 mph, while its price tag is over $35,000. And honestly, although they tried to bring diversity to the design of traditional bikes, they indeed created yet another Beetle. Only in a motorcycle form.
6 Honda Rune
If there’d be a motorcycle Batman would ride in a heartbeat, it would be the Honda Rune. That may sound great to you, only before you consider that Batman wore his underpants on the outside. We’re not entirely sure the superhero had a lot of taste.
The Honda Rune was built in Ohio in 2004 as a limited edition for the American market. Honda tried to attract American customers away from Harley Davidson and towards Honda bikes. And, fortunately, it didn’t work that well. While on the first look, this bike might look cool, it gets exhausting on the second one.
5 Brammo Empulse R
Perhaps it’s because we aren’t into the hippy new-age of hugging trees, electric or otherwise, but we prefer motorcycles that feel and look like one. The Empulse R is manufactured by Brammo, an American company that designs electric bikes. And besides its looks, there are so many things we don’t like about it.
First, the Brammo Empulse makes almost zero noise. Don’t get us wrong: we’re not confusing motorcycles for music instruments. But, then again, would Triumph be a Triumph if it didn’t sound like it does? No matter how much we hate to admit it, the sound of the exhaust is what makes us turn heads. Not to mention its overall exterior and shape. An ugly duckling.
4 MV X Zagato F4Z
Perhaps Zagato’s idea of experimenting with motorcycles wasn’t that great. They should strictly stick to modifying cars. In fact, Zagato, the independent coachbuilder and design studio, based in Milano, Italy, usually uses Aston Martin or Maserati products as a base for their designs.
However, in this case, Zagato decided to take the MV Augusta Tambourini as a base model and create something hideous. The F4Z was Zagato’s first experience in the motorcycle industry, and we hope it’s their last.
3 Ducati 999
The 999 is a disgrace to the Ducati line. It’s truly a shame that it followed icons such as the 916, the 996, and the 998. You know a motorcycle is ugly when it doesn’t grow on you even after a long time. The proof for that is how much this motorcycle depreciated over time. That’s no surprise when you consider its front and how impractical it is.
The under-seat exhaust will be as hard as ever to replace. Plus, the vents on the side of the headlights seem like an afterthought. But, perhaps in the effort of creating a motorcycle better than the 916 (which is genuinely impossible), the Ducati team created something that’s ten times worse.
2 BMW C1
To this day, people don’t know what the C1 really is. It doesn’t feel like a motorcycle, although it has a massive engine, and you need a bike license to ride it. But scooters don’t have a roof, windscreen, and seatbelts. And something tells us it’s not a car either. It’s confusing, we know.
But one thing’s for sure: the C1 is ugly as a sin. Plus, it’s extremely slow, and although BMW ads showed that it’s the “safest motorcycle” out there, it’s really not. That’s why it failed. Even in the 2000s, it looked outdated, let alone today.
1 Victory Vision
How many times have you read articles referring to Victory Vision as ugly? Well, this proves our point. It really is. If you already own a Victory Vision, we highly suggest you put a paper bag over your helmet, so no one recognizes you. Or cover the whole bike with a paper bag. Whatever works best.
Nevertheless, the Vision is too overstyled and oversized ever to be taken seriously as a tourer bike, especially. We appreciate that they deified the norms of design, but they could’ve done that in a less offensive way.